Are Female Bodybuilders Actually Men?

Kim Buck is ALL woman.
Kim Buck is ALL woman.

The answer is simple.

No.

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Oh, were you expecting me to elaborate further?

Alright, I can do that. Judging from what WordPress tells me, the question “Are female bodybuilders actually men?” is a question that frequently brings people to my humble blog. That also includes questions similar to it such as “Are FBBs really men?” or “Do female bodybuilders become men?” Aren’t you glad we have tools like Google at our disposal in this curious age?

This curiosity is unto itself curious. Is there a small group of people in this world who genuinely think female bodybuilders are actually male bodybuilders in disguise (or female bodybuilders who’ve magically transitioned to a different gender)? Or is this meant to be a joke? Or, these folks do know female bodybuilders are actually female…but they just want to make sure? Hey, the world can be a confusing place. It never hurts to ask, right?

Uh, right. It doesn’t hurt to ask. I’m totally in favor of people quenching their thirst for knowledge. Human beings are curious creatures, which means we constantly need our curiosity taken to its rightful conclusion. Ignorance has never served anyone well, as far as I can tell.

So I have no beef against anyone who does an innocent Google search in regards to this question. It may seem silly, but I don’t think it’s spiteful. Biology can be a fascinating area of study. How can a translucent jellyfish with no discernable internal organs survive? How can some creatures like Komodo dragons and hammerhead sharks reproduce asexually? Not all of them do, but scientists have observed many of them being able to. How is that even possible?

Well, it is possible. Life is full of mysteries. This is especially true when our worldviews are perpetually being challenged, poked, and prodded. You don’t need a degree in Gender Studies from Oberlin College to know that our traditional male/female dichotomy may not always accurately describe all of us. Postmodern philosophy has broken apart our black and white way of thinking about the Universe, for better or for worse. I’ll let you decide which it is.

But what cannot be argued is the existence of doubt. Are we human beings truly born male or female? Are these the only two categories that can possibly exist? Could there be more? Or, is gender unto itself not a real thing, but instead an artificial social construct created for arbitrary reasons? To tell you the truth, I will not take a stand either way. How the heck am I supposed to know?

How can one actually think Ava Cowan is maybe a man?
How can one actually think Ava Cowan is maybe a man?

At the heart of this discussion is the concept of doubt. There are many truths that we think are true…but in the back of our minds we know that there exists the possibility that they may not. Unless we’re not terribly self-reflective, people should consistently challenge their own beliefs so that they can continue to grow and mature. It’s not a sign of moral cowardice or intellectual fraud, but rather an admission of humility. We do not know all that there is to know, and what we think we know we may not actually be right about. To admit that is to convey wisdom, not foolishness.

People who are familiar with female bodybuilders but are not closely connected with them are right to be curious. Those of us who are intimately familiar with FBBs – we either have met many of them for muscle worship/wrestling sessions or we pay close attention to them from a distance – have no doubts as to the gender identities of these gorgeous ladies. They’re women, simple and plain. Of course, they’re women whose physical appearance is unusual. But that doesn’t change who they are as people. They may not behave like “normal” women and could perhaps accomplish feats of strength that surpass that of many men, but that still doesn’t make a difference whatsoever. Female bodybuilders are female, period. There’s no argument there. However, one could frame this debate in terms of how we define “gender” to begin with.

Simply put, is “gender” a purely biological trait or is it an indicator of one’s personal identity? Without getting too deep into the weeds, let’s just say that there probably isn’t a definitive answer to this question that will satisfy 100% of us 100% of the time. We don’t live in that type of philosophical atmosphere anymore. We have far too many diverse ideas and viewpoints out there to establish any kind of universal understanding. I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing, but it could be when these differences are used to intentionally divide and conquer us.

A better angle to take is to analyze who female bodybuilders are and what makes them so special. In addition to reading every single one of my previous blog articles (which, um, you should), let’s gain a better grasp of this topic together by establishing this concept:

Female bodybuilders challenge the way we see the world.

More than anything else, this nugget of truth cuts to the core of the matter. This is the meat and potatoes of our discussion. Female bodybuilders cannot help but turn our worlds upside down. They may not intentionally try to do so, but they do so nevertheless. It’s nearly inevitable to start to rethink how we view the world when we see photos of a woman with big burly muscles. The sight of them goes against how we view femininity, masculinity, human potential, and sexuality. All our lives we’ve assumed that women are the “weaker sex.” Is this not actually true? Are women indeed the weaker sex, or are they just at a natural disadvantage? You know, sort of like a sprinter who begins the race 20 yards behind the other competitors. The sprinter can still win, but it’ll take some extra effort (and perhaps a bit of luck) to do so.

Diana Tyuleneva wearing a hot BDSM outfit.
Diana Tyuleneva wearing a hot BDSM outfit.

The presence of a woman with muscles also challenges how men view themselves. If she can get that big, why can’t I? If I’m struggling to bulk up at the gym, what excuse could I possibly have when I’m scrolling through Instagram and notice some Finnish chick named Minna Pajulahti deadlifting more than me? Female bodybuilders can, understandably, create feelings of inadequacy in guys who are already somewhat insecure about themselves. This is not an indictment. It’s just the way things are.

Seeing a woman with big muscles also begs us to ask the question: Is there a limit to what humans can do? And to be clear, this goes for both men and women. Can human beings slowly but surely evolve to be able to swim under water for hours at a time? Or fly through the sky? Or become as strong as an ox? Or upgrade our intelligence level to unprecedented heights, where we will be able to teach advanced physics to grade school children? I cannot say yay or nay, but how one cannot stop to ponder such possibilities is beyond me. After all, seeing a female bodybuilder be able to lift heavy weights at the gym is like a smack in the face. If that doesn’t wake you up to challenge your preconceived notions about the Universe, I don’t know what will.

But more than anything, female bodybuilders force us to move the goal posts in terms of what is possible and what is not possible. Don’t say that certain physical feats are impossible because the moment you do someone will come around and shatter that opinion into a million pieces. Don’t say that a woman with muscles can’t be sexy. I can provide you with a list of hundreds of names that will test that belief. Don’t doubt the fact that female powerlifters can’t surpass the accomplishments of male powerlifters. Just do a Google search of Becca Swanson. You’ll be glad that you did.

What we thought we knew we need to reevaluate. What we were taught may be wrong; even if it was taught to us in good faith. But in addition to beliefs, female bodybuilders also change the way we view sexual attraction.

Before, we assumed that people who are attracted to women are attracted to just, well, “normal” looking women. However, the discovery of muscular women (and to be fair, other nontraditional-looking ladies) throws us for a loop. We ask ourselves how we can possibly be attracted to a woman who has bigger muscles than most men. Does that mean I’m secretly gay? Or is this perfectly normal? How can I tell either way? These questions abound, much to our consternation.

Eventually, many of us will reach the conclusion that it’s perfectly fine to be attracted to muscular women because…they’re still women. Obviously, they don’t look like most other women you encounter in everyday life, but that’s not an indicator of anything unnatural. It’s unusual, but it doesn’t cross any forbidden boundaries. To repeat the answer provided at the beginning, female bodybuilders are not men. Not even close. So why is there even a debate?

Well, there deserves to be a discussion about this topic because of the initial, involuntary gut feeling we received when we first encountered the world of muscular women. Due to all the reasons listed above, the presence of muscular women triggers in our minds an adverse reaction. Like side effects from taking prescription medicine (we’ve all wondered whether vomiting, cramps, and possibly death are acceptable trade-offs for alieving us of the sniffles), it’s like our brains are fighting off a foreign agent when we look upon an image of a woman with big muscles. We feel repulsed. Or confused. Or extreme cognitive dissonance. Or maybe, unexpected and uncontrollable sexual arousal.

Denise Masino may be well-endowed, but she's not even close to being a man.
Denise Masino may be well-endowed, but she’s not even close to being a man.

These reactions are unexplainable. They’re inconceivable. They’re not normal, yet we’re intrigued to learn more. The sight of a muscular woman stirs up in our imaginations all sorts of thoughts and feelings. We begin to question our previously held assumptions about, well, everything in the damn world. We feel compelled, for no logical reason, to do a Google search about whether or not female bodybuilders are actually female or if they’re somehow “male” by some perverse definition.

We realize it’s silly. We know in the back of our minds that female bodybuilders are definitely women. But we can’t help but feed our curiosity. We must know for sure. In the dark recesses of our imaginations there’s a tiny part of us that thinks that maybe FBBs are not really women in the traditional sense of the word. Or maybe they’re women…sort of. Kind of. Maybe they’re men…sort of. Kind of. Or perhaps they’ve transitioned into a third option. Uh, right?

Yikes. What the hell am I thinking?

You want to slap yourself in the face, but resist the urge to do so. That’s good. No need for self-flagellation. At the very least, you can smile to yourself, look into a mirror, and whisper to no one in particular: “Hey, what I Google in the privacy of my spare time is my business and no one needs to know about it!”

Which is true. Of course it is. No one will ever know what you choose to Google, unless you believe all sorts of wacky conspiracy theories. Do search engine crawlers count?

There’s nothing male about female bodybuilders. There are plenty of FBBs who exhibit masculine qualities, but that’s a whole other story. Masculine/feminine are behavioral and physical signifiers that have no biological connections. A man can have a “feminine-sounding” voice and still be 100% a man. A woman can have “masculine-looking” facial features but still be 100% a woman. Biology is more objective than arbitrary gendered descriptions that societies have used for centuries. Whether these identifiers are good or bad is up to you to decide. Volumes of books have been written on the harm produced by gender roles, so I don’t feel too obligated to rehash these ideas at this time.

Suffice to say, it’s not a bad thing to have questions. Being inquisitive is a sign of wisdom, humility, and practical intelligence. Nobody knows the answers to everything. That’s simply impossible. Heck, as incredible as this sounds, despite all the breakthroughs we’ve made in recent generations in regards to theoretical physics, we still don’t know even a fraction of a fraction of what there is to know about the Universe. Theorists like Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking are like the One Eyed Kings leading a pack of blind subjects. But in this case, they have one eye that’s peering into the world through a coffee straw. They are able to speculate about the world at levels that most of us will never be able to comprehend, and even they can’t manage to scratch the surface. Far out, man!

Makes you not feel so guilty about wondering if Denise Masino is secretly a dude, huh?

I can assure you that Denise Masino is not a dude. Despite the impressive amount of meat dangling between her legs, I can assure you that it’s all feminine meat. Nothing masculine about it. She doesn’t have a penis. Though her phallic-like clit sort of resembles a really tiny penis (especially when she uses a clit pump), there’s no doubt that it’s a clit, end of story. Beneath her impressive feminine endowment is her vagina, an organ I don’t believe too many men can say they also have.

Maryse Manios isn't everybody's cup of tea, but there's no doubt that she's a lady. No doubt at all.
Maryse Manios isn’t everybody’s cup of tea, but there’s no doubt that she’s a lady. No doubt at all.

As far as I can tell, it is not possible for a woman to become a man without an intricately planned series of hormonal therapy sessions administered by trained medical professionals. I am no expert about the female-to-male or male-to-female transition processes, but lifting weights at the gym (and yes, even taking synthetic steroids to help you bulk up more) will not do the trick. Of course, I don’t think too many folks actually believe this. So to reiterate, it’s hard to not question your assumptions when you’re faced with examples that challenge them.

Female bodybuilders are not actually men. I understand why someone would allow their minds to drift in that direction, but at the end of the day there’s no evidence to suggest that such a phenomenon is even scientifically possible. But that doesn’t mean we should mock people who do dare to Google such a titillating question.

There’s an old saying that “it never hurts to ask.” Well, that’s not entirely true. It can hurt if the person(s) to whom you’re asking the question retaliates in any sort of way. However, that’s the beauty of the Internet. You can ask away with little risk to your reputation or ego. I may not have all the answers, but I am qualified to provide a small degree of insight onto the issue of female bodybuilders and their gender identities:

Female bodybuilders are female, not male. You can take it to the bank and bet your life’s savings on it. But if even a slight hint of doubt creeps into your mind, remember this: That’s perfectly okay.

The Bigger the Clit, the Happier We All Are (NSFW)

Angela Salvagno sharing with the world her stretched out labia.
Angela Salvagno sharing with the world her stretched out labia.

By far, the most erotic part of a female bodybuilder’s body is her clitoris. Some FBBs – Denise Masino, Angela Salvagno, Amber DeLuca, and Brandi Mae Akers being a few examples – are famous for their enormous feminine endowments (Rikochan also deserves recognition, even though she’s not an FBB). On behalf of fans of these women all over the world, I can say with great certainty that we deeply appreciate their collective willingness to share this tantalizingly intimate part of their bodies.

No female bodybuilder is ever under any obligation to share her body with the world. No woman is, for that matter. But those who consensually choose to release photos and videos revealing the impressive nub of meat protruding between their legs are a blessed bunch of women. We thank you all, from the bottom of our hearts!

Without a doubt, men – whether they already like muscular women or not – are fascinated with a female bodybuilder’s genitalia. What does it look like? Is it different than “normal” women’s genitals? Are all their clits huge? What makes their clits so big? Do their clits become more sensitive? Is it really a penis? Do taking steroids make female bodybuilders become men (or take on overtly masculine qualities)? Do female bodybuilders experience better orgasms? Why can’t I stop fantasizing about giving a strong muscular woman a spine tingling orgasm?

Inquiring minds need to know!

Alright, everyone. Let’s slow down for a moment and take some time to dive into this topic.

There are thousands of different genres of pornography out there. Some range from the benign to the bizarre to the freaky to the unethical. And everything in between. Porn is a fascinating topic of discussion, one that we’ll never stop talking about. That being said, out of the countless genres and subgenres (and sub-sub genres) of porn available on the open market, one in particular that is worth mentioning is female muscle fetishism.

Porn featuring female bodybuilders can be just as boring, bland, and tacky as any other kind of porn you’ll stumble across. Some is disgusting, some is legitimately erotic, but a lot of it is crude and unintelligent. But if there’s anything that excites a female muscle fan like nothing else can, it’s close up shots of an FBB’s clitoris. Big, swollen, excited, and juicy, we cannot get enough of it.

Denise Masino is legendary for what exists between her strong legs.
Denise Masino is legendary for what exists between her strong legs.

So much so, we keep returning to the kinds of photos and videos that give us what we crave: Big clits. I can say with complete confidence that the bigger the clit, the happier we all are.

Now, before I jump off the deep end of the swimming pool, let’s explore why this is important. I’ve written in previous blog articles why men are fascinated with a female bodybuilder’s genitalia. In this column, I’m going to talk about why it’s empowering for a female bodybuilder to have large genitalia, and why it’s important for the men (and women) who like them to recognize this.

From what I can gather from researching this topic, having a large clitoris doesn’t necessarily provide a woman any further sexual advantages (in regards to her own pleasure) compared to women with normal sized clitorises. There could possibly be some scientific evidence suggesting that women with large clitoral endowments experience sexual pleasure differently, but such research has yet to be conducted to my knowledge. Suffice to say, in terms of physical biology, I cannot say with complete confidence that a large clitoris is objectively significant in any way.

However, having a large clit carries very real symbolic significance. Without getting into too much physiological detail – from which I will admit I am far from being an educated expert! – here is what we know: The female clitoris is homologous to the male penis. In biological terms, this refers to two physical characteristics that are “similar in position, structure, and evolutionary origin but not necessarily in function.”

If what separates a male and female is based purely on chromosomes – XX for females and XY for males – then we can conclude that we were all born genderless but during our development in utero, at some point changes occur which lead to the differences we see after birth. So while the clitoris and the penis are structurally similar, they are nevertheless two distinct parts of the human body. And, they should be treated as such.

Amber DeLuca looking as gorgeous as ever.
Amber DeLuca looking as gorgeous as ever.

It is often pointed out (by sexologists, feminists, and anyone who’s interested in human sexuality) that the clitoris is unique in that it’s the only organ of the human body that exists purely for the purpose of providing sexual pleasure. It may also be more sensitive than the penis, which perhaps gives women more heightened delight from direct stimulation. I’m not a woman, so I can’t verify that claim. But let’s assume this is more or less the truth.

In the process of reproduction, it is often assumed that the penis and the vagina are two sides of the same coin. The man releases sperm from his penis into the woman’s vagina, which carries the sperm through her uterus and eventually to her ovaries, and blah, blah, blah. In a way, the penis and the vagina mostly act as the passageways through which a newborn human being is produced. Boring stuff, right?

Yes. However, things get more exciting once we add the element of sensual pleasure to the mix. Traditionally, we think of human orgasms as being produced by the penis and the vagina. But that doesn’t paint a complete picture. The clitoris is intricately tied to the vagina. Some researchers argue that there is no such thing as a vaginal orgasm, that all female orgasms are clitoral orgasms. The clitoris is far larger than what we see on the surface. The vast majority of it exists inside a woman’s body, not outside of it.

So we really need to think of female pleasure in terms of the clitoris, not the vagina. Fine. Now what? Why is this important?

Culturally speaking, acknowledging that the clitoris is how a woman really achieves orgasm tears down the notion that female sexuality is inherently passive. For thousands of years, we’ve treated male sexuality as a given. Female sexuality, on the other hand, has unfortunately been pushed aside for far too long. During the act of sex, we mechanically think of the penis as the instigator. It is doing the stimulating. It is initiating the reproductive process. Without the penis, sex wouldn’t exist.

Along that same wavelength, the vagina is often thought of as a passive participant. It is the vagina that is penetrated. It is the vagina that is being stimulated. It is the vagina that is part of the reproductive process, not the organ that is activating this process. Without the penis, the vagina is worthless.

This mindset is obviously wrong. Women are completely capable of pleasing themselves without a male companion. But what makes the existence of the clitoris so incredible is that it exemplifies this point thanks to its physical structure.

A strong beautiful black woman named Desiree Ellis. Slaaaaayyyyy!
A strong beautiful black woman named Desiree Ellis. Slaaaaayyyyy!

The penis is an outward organ that is plain for the eye to see. The vagina, however, exists internally and is not easily visible. For the vast majority of women, their genitalia looks like a simple slit that runs down between their legs. That’s it. Schoolchildren often say that boys have a penis and girls have nothing down there. That’s obviously wrong, but that line of thinking makes sense when you think of genitalia purely in observable terms. The penis is easy to observe. The vagina is not.

So once these schoolchildren grow up into adulthood, they have ingrained into their brains the belief that the vagina is subordinate to the penis in terms of providing both partners mutual sexual pleasure. They might intellectually understand that this is a bunch of BS, but cultural teachings can be difficult to fully scrub. An adult man looks at his penis and sees a tool for giving and receiving pleasure. An adult woman looks down between her legs and sees…nothing.

But not so with certain female bodybuilders. Angela Salvagno looks down between her legs and sees…a lot. Oh boy, does she see a lot! Big meaty labia, a thick clitoral hood, and of course, an enormous clitoris itself. For most women, their genitals are mostly hidden inside their bodies, as if it’s almost ashamed to come out into the light. Miss Salvagno, on the other hand, can proudly display her genitalia because of how large, open, and easy it is to see.

That’s the difference. Female bodybuilders with enhanced genitalia prove the point that a woman’s sexual organs don’t have to be small, timid, and passively hidden from sight. Rather, her labia, clit, and vagina can be just as plain to see as a man’s penis and scrotum. She can “let it all hang out” just as a man can. If any of you do a Google search of Angela Salvagno or Denise Masino, you will be fortunate to see just how enthusiastic they are about showing off their goods to the public!

On a symbolic level, having large genitalia empowers you. Men with big penises are considered manlier and more sexually powerful than men with smaller endowments. But does the same standard exist for women? Not really, but female bodybuilders can alter those perceptions. A strong muscular woman with large genitalia shatters the perception that female sexuality must be passive and subordinate to male sexuality. The image of a beautiful and buff FBB with a gigantic clitoris communicates independence, sexual vitality, and female empowerment. I realize the concept of “empowerment” has become an annoying cliché in recent years, but bear with me for a moment. When I see a female bodybuilder with big genitals, I see a woman who is unquestionably and unapologetically in charge of her own sexuality. She controls the terms of her pleasure. She controls her body. She controls how she lives her life. This is incredible. This is important for all of us to see.

Kathy Connors soaking up the sun.
Kathy Connors soaking up the sun.

A large clitoris may not necessarily give a woman more pleasure, but it definitely creates the illusion that she is certainly more than capable of experiencing pleasure for her own sake. She can actively stimulate her clit to orgasm, just as a man can masturbate his penis to orgasm. Women can also pleasure themselves with dildos and vibrators, but those are still phallic-like tools that merely replace a human penis with an artificial mechanical substitute.

But a large clit changes the game. She can pinch, rub, and squeeze her clit toward a satisfying climax anytime she wants to. She doesn’t need a man, a woman, or a phallic proxy to assist her. She doesn’t need to be penetrated in order to experience pleasure (on a side note, doesn’t the word “penetrate” carry with it subtle undertones of violence and invasion?). She can provide herself external stimulation that further reinforces the idea that she is an autonomous sexual creature who is abundantly capable of experiencing as much sensual delights as her male counterparts.

A female bodybuilder who proudly shows off her enormous genitals creates a whole new paradigm in the world of human sexuality. No longer are women second-class sexual citizens. No longer are they defined by what they don’t have, but rather by what they do have.

Come to think of it, that’s the crux of the matter! Going back to the schoolyard illustration, little boys are fully aware of what they have between their legs. Girls are less certain. Therefore, society is taught to view boys by the anatomy they possess and girls by the anatomy they don’t possess. When an obstetrician delivers a newborn baby, they check to see if it has a penis or not, as opposed to if it has a vagina or not. What a funny world we live in.

As male-centric as our society may be (and still is), we’re slowly but surely starting to recognize the fact that women have sexualities of their own that should be celebrated, taught to our children, and acknowledged as factual reality. Women don’t possess nothing down there. They possess quite a lot! Most of it may be hidden, but all you have to do is conduct a Google search for pictures of nude female bodybuilders and you’ll get a good idea of what a woman actually has going on down there.

When women are empowered to embrace their own sexuality, everyone benefits. Women benefit, men benefit, society benefits. It’s a win-win-win proposition. Female bodybuilders play an integral role in punctuating the point that women can be physically strong as well as sexually potent. Of course, much of this is more symbolic than anything else, but that’s beside the point. Female bodybuilders are not an ideal toward which all women should strive, but rather a pronounced example of what women can become. A big clit doesn’t actually signify enriched sexual power; instead it proves the point with the force of a sledgehammer that women can be independent sexual agents who are fully capable of experiencing sensual pleasure without the need for outside assistance.

If she wants a man to help her achieve orgasm, great! If she wants a fellow woman to assist her, that’s also great. If she wants to act all by herself and assert her own libidinous sovereignty, that’s obviously quite great.

Oh baby. Brandi Mae Akers.
Oh baby. Brandi Mae Akers.

Women are immeasurably important to our world. But it’s a tragic reality that the world is not entirely safe or welcoming to them. There are hostile forces working against women all across the globe that will take generations to stamp out (if it can be defeated at all, which is debatable). However, even if it has a miniscule impact on a few people’s biases, a female bodybuilder’s large clitoris can change people’s hearts and minds forever. Maybe not in an immediate and tangible way, but in a more figurative and representational way.

It may not be much, but whatever you can get is gravy on top. It continuously breaks my heart to read about the plight of women and girls around the world. But judging from WordPress’s analytics, I know for a fact that my blog is read by people who live in countries that are openly hostile toward women (both culturally and politically). This humble article may not achieve much, but at least I hope I can get the ball rolling in a more positive direction.

Here is my expression of gratitude to women with big clits who are proud to show them off:

Thank you! Thank you for titillating us, teasing us, arousing us, and captivating us. Thank you for sharing an intimate part of your body that you have absolutely zero obligation to show off. Nobody forces you to share this private part of your life…you choose to do it voluntarily. Your reasons for doing so may be because of exhibitionism, smart business acumen, or for purely financial gain; but an unintended benefit of doing so is that you’ve opened the doors for women everywhere to freely express their sexuality and for men to witness this first-hand. We all benefit. No matter who we are, where we live, or what we believe. You may not realize this, but you’re doing a tremendous amount of good.

You may not see any tangible benefits right away but rest assured, they will crop up sooner rather than later. Hopefully, much sooner than any of us would think. Women and girls have a long way to go in terms of living in a more just society, but as far as I’m concerned, you’re playing your part – no matter how infinitesimal it may seem – toward cultivating this ideal world.

Thank you!

Taming the Wild Beast: Giving an Orgasm to a Muscular Woman

If Jane looked like this, would Tarzan still want to be with her?
If Jane looked like this, would Tarzan still want to be with her?

There is a common belief out there that men who love muscular women also love (or fantasize about) being dominated by a muscular woman. While there is a close link between female muscle fetishism and BDSM, the two can be mutually exclusive. I would argue they can exist independently.

Nevertheless, the weak man/strong woman motif persists for good reasons. Men who pay strong women for sessions do so for the privileges of wrestling them or worshiping their muscles. Either way, they’re willing to shell out $300 to $500 of their hard earned cash because they love living out the fantasy of being physically and emotionally dominated by a stronger woman.

This fantasy goes a bit further, however. Deep down inside, even the most beta male secretly wishes he can win the upper hand against a stronger female opponent. While there are guys who fetishize the idea of being completely dominated by a woman, there exists other fantasies that go along with that. Primarily, the fantasy of “taming the wild beast.”

For as long as human civilization has been around, it has been commonly accepted that men are naturally stronger than women. This has led to men being the ones who’ve organized society’s political, social, economic, and religious structures. For better or for worse, this is still how things operate today, although that trend is starting to move in the other direction. There is no doubt women are gaining further traction in today’s world, but the way business has been done for thousands of years cannot be radically altered overnight.

Perhaps this “changing of the guard” where men and women are enjoying (more or less) “equal” footing in society’s power structures explains the popularity of men fetishizing being dominated by a woman. There are countless men in this world who are in control but do not necessarily want to be in control. Just as Spider-Man could tell you, with great power comes great responsibility. And great responsibility can be a heavy emotional burden.

Sexologists will argue that the male fantasy of being dominated by a woman is borne out of a desire for powerful men to be able to “let go” and be powerless for at least a few moments in his life. Heavy lies the crown, so the adage goes. This temporary abdication of power is a man’s way of releasing his inner burdens and allowing someone else to take control for once. So perhaps we’re looking at this in completely the wrong way. Guys who love muscular women aren’t necessarily beta males who enjoy submitting themselves to feminine power. Instead, they might just be “average, normal dudes” who crave momentary relief from their male “duties.”

We could go on exploring this issue, but let’s return to the main topic. The association of a muscular woman with a “wild beast” shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone. Pulp novels of long ago used to portray “jungle women” who would capture, torment, scheme against, and engage in steamy sexual relationships with their male counterparts. The jungle motif continues to be seen today in photoshoots involving female bodybuilders and models. Our pop culture associates a strong, muscular physique with keen survival skills, an animalistic personality, and fierce independence.

What if Jane looked like Dayana Cadeau?
What if Jane looked like Dayana Cadeau?

Tarzan wasn’t a weakling. Jane might have been, but certainly not her lover. If we turn the tables around and fantasize about Denise Masino or Alina Popa as modern-day female Tarzans, how many of us would put ourselves into the shoes of Jane? Would we be named James? Or John? Or Jim?

However, as much as we love to think of our favorite female bodybuilders as strong, sexy, independent creatures who can kick our ass at the drop of a hat, deep down inside our imaginations exist an interesting layer to this fantasy. We still want to be in charge. We may enjoy being pinned down, talked down to, and humiliated by a strong woman, but at the end of the day we want to assert our God-given dominance in one way or another.

So how do we do that? In this particular fantasy, the answer – of course! – has a sexual component to it.

If a weaker guy cannot physically dominate a stronger woman, he can assert his dominance in a sexual way instead. How is that done? Simple:

Giving a female bodybuilder an orgasm.

Obviously, not every female bodybuilder who offers sessions will allow that level of sexual intimacy to her clients. That’s not what I’m talking about. Instead, I’m referring to the fantasy of giving a strong muscular woman an orgasm. Let’s talk about this point in further detail.

There are many ways men can demonstrate their dominance over a woman. Not all of them are sexist or spiteful, although these behaviors could certainly be taken to those unfortunate extremes. A guy could show off his strength at the gym, flaunt his wealth at a fancy restaurant, impress his date by introducing her to his high-status friends, remind everyone how much influence he has at his job, and so on. Yeah, many of these things can make you out to look like an egotistical jerk, so I don’t recommend you exhibit these manners too often.

A jungle-themed photoshoot with Wendy McMaster.
A jungle-themed photoshoot with Wendy McMaster.

But…there is another way. It’s less public (at least, traditionally speaking), but it’s a certifiable way to prove one’s dominance. It involves pleasing her in the bedroom. How strange it is that the ultimate act of proving’s one’s manhood involves giving pleasure to a woman. Guys can brag all they want in the locker room about how many women they’ve slept with, but what’s less certain is figuring out how many of these women found the experience of sleeping with you pleasant. You can have sex with ten women in one wild weekend, but if every single one of them left your bedroom bored and unsatisfied, how much of a “Man” are you?

On the other hand, if a man makes love to only one woman – his wife or girlfriend, perhaps – during one eventful passionate evening, and she experiences a multitude of gratifying orgasms, is this guy more of a “Man” than the guy who slept with ten women who didn’t feel a thing while doing the deed with him?

Yes, of course!

This is why a man’s penis is nicknamed his “manhood.” It’s what makes a man a man. Not only does the penis biologically separate a man from a woman, it’s his way of showcasing his dominion over her. Contrast the guy who sleeps with ten women who can’t remember his name with another guy who spends the whole night with one woman who can’t get enough of him. Satisfying climax after satisfying climax, she’s sure she’ll never have it this good ever again in her life. Without question, this guy is much more of a “Man” than the first guy who should really see a doctor about getting an STD test.

A typical "jungle woman" cover from an old-school pulp novel.
A typical “jungle woman” cover from an old-school pulp novel.

Therefore, this explains the fantasy. A female bodybuilder may be leaps and bounds more powerful, confident, strong, and tough than her weaker male lover. However, in the bedroom, it’s a whole other story. There, he can validate his manliness. She may have bigger muscles, but he has a penis that can satisfy her like no other can. All the dildos and vibrators in the world cannot compare to his manhood. Through the act of sex, the tables are turned. During a passionate lovemaking session, he is the dominate one and she is the weaker one – regardless of the size of her muscles.

Women are different than men in regards to what happens post-orgasm. As one young lady I know once told me, when it comes to having multiple orgasms, women “can keep going until they decide to stop.” Good for them! Guys, on the other hand, are much different. We have one…and we’re as good as spent. There’s a reason why many of us like to get off right before going to sleep. It helps us get to sleep! Our energy is drained and it takes at least 15 to 20 minutes before we can get hard again. And if we do get hard again, you can guarantee our level of enthusiasm won’t be nearly as high as it was beforehand.

But let’s ignore this and assume a satisfying orgasm will sap you of all your energy. After successfully providing one’s sexual partner a toe-curling, scream-inducing satiating orgasm, isn’t it like taming a wild beast? The contrast of energy level couldn’t be starker. During sex, people can exert a tremendous amount of energy. Post-sex, it’s like someone took out your battery and flung it out the window. You’re completely and utterly drained.

Tamed, indeed.

This is the origin of this fantasy. Guys who love a wild and dangerous (whether she’s actually wild and dangerous is beside the point; it’s the fantasy that matters most) female bodybuilder feel the intense urge to “cut her down to size” and show her what a real man is like. It’s understandable for a normal-looking man to feel emasculated when in the presence of a muscular woman. Deep down inside, he yearns to be able to make love to her so passionately and so intently that she’s willing to submit to his every whim.

Perhaps submission is the name of the game. One could argue inside every insecure man is an ultra-masculine He-Man ready to jump out and take on the world singlehandedly. I may not feel that way, but I’m sure there are plenty of guys out there who do. I’m not passing down any judgement or trying to psychoanalyze their situation. I’m just trying to make sense out of a fervent fantasy a lot of female muscle lovers share – whether they know it or not.

Post-sex, the image of a strong, powerful female bodybuilder purring like a cat as she snuggles up close to me in bed is enough to get my heart rate going. If she were to whisper sweet nothings into my ear, I might just pass out. Come to think of it, I guess I do share this fantasy!

Taming the wild beast can come in many forms. One could physically show one’s dominance over a muscular woman…but that’s not nearly erotic enough. One could tie her up and play the part of a male dominatrix…but that’s kinky and doesn’t prove anything. Roleplaying is fun, but at the end of the day it’s two consenting adults creating a false reality for the sake of mutual erotic amusement. It’s not real. But having sex with a female bodybuilder and showing her how much of a Casanova you are…well, it’s not like such a thing could actually happen to me, but at least you could consider it an actual accomplishment.

Denise Masino is a wild beast who needs to be tamed.
Denise Masino is a wild beast who needs to be tamed.

Right, there, that’s at the heart of this discussion: showcasing an accomplishment to a woman who has her fair share of impressive accomplishments. Guys who love muscular women also want to “prove” to her that he’s a man and she’s still a woman. The differences in physical strength notwithstanding, guys still want to be the one in charge. They might enjoy being dominated by her for kicks and giggles, but when push comes to shove he still wants the opportunity to assert his masculinity. He doesn’t think he’s superior to her (or that she’s inferior to him); rather he desires to let her know who’s who in this relationship.

Giving an orgasm to a female bodybuilder is the premiere way to prove to her what kind of a Man you are. You deserve the capital “M,” no ifs, ands, or buts about it. And you don’t want to do it by fingering her or performing cunnilingus on her. That’s perfectly okay, but you want to show her you’re a Man the old fashioned way: stick your hard manhood inside her and ride her till she begs for more. And when she does beg for more (assuming your fantasy goes this far), you can choose to either fulfill her wishes or deny her what she wants.

And to make matters better, because it takes guys a little while to get hard again, she has to wait for you to be able to make love to her again. Imagine that!

That’s what this is all about. Whether you want to please her till she’s purring like a kitten or you want to deny her what she desires, it’s your choice. It’s fantasy, and you can definitely see how this could play out in reality. You are a Man. She is a Woman. You dream of demonstrating to her who’s who and leaving absolutely no doubt about it.

She’s still an incredibly strong Woman, but you’re a Man, and there’s nothing that can take that away from you. She is a Wild Beast and you must tame her before she gets out of control. You’re a Man. It’s what you’re supposed to do. She knows it, but she wants to know if you know it.

So there you go. You just want to send her a message. And have fun while doing it. That’s a win-win in my book.

“Taming the Wild Beast” is a fantasy that can be counterintuitive. A weak man who’s with a strong woman doesn’t have to feel emasculated. In fact, he can feel quite the opposite. She may be able to beat him at arm wrestling or deadlift more than him at the gym, but he can still satisfy her in bed and leave her begging for more. This intends to shift the balance of power away from her and toward him…where it rightfully belongs.

I believe this is Julie Bonnett. Can anybody say otherwise?
I believe this is Julie Bonnett. Can anybody say otherwise?

No matter how big she grows, no matter how large her muscles become, no matter how powerful she can be…she can never truly supersede his role as the dominant Alpha Male. A female bodybuilder can pretend to be the Alpha Female, but all that comes to a crashing halt the moment he successfully gives her a fulfilling orgasmic experience. Physical strength can be manufactured at the gym. Sexual prowess is innate. There’s nothing she can do to turn the tide on thousands of years of male/female biological reality.

At the end of the day, he has the penis and she has the vagina. In this fantasy, the vagina is unquestionably subordinate to the penis. Without a penis, the vagina exists in a vacuum. She can masturbate all she wants – and she could very well give herself fantastic climaxes – but there’s still a void left in her sex life. Who can fill that void?

You guessed it. The Man.

Even if this Man is smaller, weaker, and physically unremarkable. Even if the Woman is larger, stronger, and more dynamic. That’s irrelevant. The “Taming the Wild Beast” fantasy ignores those realities and puts the Man in the driver’s seat. This isn’t rooted in sexism, misogyny or even insecurity. It’s rooted in the desire to relinquish control, but not totally give it up. It’s based on the belief that women can be stronger than men, but a man is still a man and a woman is still a woman. Fetishes are often simple to understand. It’s not complicated.

The beauty of this fantasy is the fact that “taming” her doesn’t involve violence or dehumanizing her. That’s out of the question. “Taming” her instead involves giving her sexual pleasure. He gets pleasure out of it as well, but what’s more important is making sure she leaves the encounter happy and satisfied.

She may be a beast on the outside, but deep down inside she can be just as vulnerable as him. It just takes a single passionate carnal encounter to bring these vulnerabilities to the surface. He derives pleasure from giving her pleasure. That’s a win-win indeed.

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